I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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