I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize