I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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