How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize
