I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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