How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
