YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
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