I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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