if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
i drank out of a bidet.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
