you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
is it fun? or sober?
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
