Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
you had me at cake vodka
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
