great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I will be naked everywhere
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Bring me that man meat
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
