My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
