There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
did i walk over a car last night?
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
