Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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