i just google imaged poop.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize