Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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