spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize