Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
