Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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