its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
