wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
