I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
