I hate your face
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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