my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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