Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I have tasted many bathrooms
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
