Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
