Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Randomize