STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
