her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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