in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize