I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
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