I'm eating all of the evidence.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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