i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
