Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
