I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
