You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Randomize