I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
