What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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