i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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