Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize