I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
