he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
