Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
they call him Oral-B. enough said
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
im on a boat
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