if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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