Pass out mid-funnel last night.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I just found puke in my bra..
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
