so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
this hospital has no fireball
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
