i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
