I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
