Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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