I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
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