Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
