Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
