We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I CAN MOONWALK!
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
