I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
